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  1. Thank you for this very useful effective article, i think i’m doing all five but inshallaha i’ll be doing with your strategies and advise, i wish to see more parenting articles as it is really a very important topic nowadays.. jazaki allahu khayran

    • You’re welcome. May Allah grant you success with the productive parenting strategies. InshaAllah another parenting article is on the way.

  2. Very nice article in parenting strategies in this technology ruled world. Productive muslim is keeping us reminded turning towards Allah very closer.

    Remember to “Yes” when really important. Praising child when they really do hard work , for example secure good marks & exceptionally do well

    Being your child’s friend instead parent. In this so much to learn & do research. Opened my eyes.

    • So true. We are our children’s first teacher. They look up to us and copy our behaviours so we have to be the best possible version of ourselves. Thanks for your comment.

  3. Really great article! I think you brought up some very crucial points that could truly benefit the society to learn and take action on. All too often we fall short in these categories and therefore raising a generation that lacks many skills or carry untold burdens from the home. May Allah give us success in raising children! Ameen!

    • Ameen! The sad thing is that we tend to parent our own children the way we were parented…unless we make a conscious decision to change. I have a parenting challenge that aims at looking into our past and understanding how we parent and then taking that to change and apply a more kinder parenting style.

  4. Ya Allah. Damned if we do and damned if we don’t. We won’t know how good of a job we have done until they’re adults, and inshallah we all do our best. I find praising works better than scalding, but I’m from an Arab country with Arab parents and they were no strangers to taking their flip flops to your backside!

    • It’s sad really. Only recently that when these children grew up that the research discovered that what parents were taught to do in the 1980s didn’t work. That is, over praising produced egotistical adults, among other discoveries.

      Parents everywhere do the best with what they know and were taught. Our only hope is to follow the sunnah and the sunnah was about kindness (but not permissive).

  5. This was so helpfull , i needed advice.. looking foward for more parenting articles. Jazak’Allahu Khair for sharing such important knowledge.

  6. Ma sha Allah
    Jazakallah khair. Indeed, we have a very huge tax at hand. May Allah (Subhannahu Wa Ta’ala) make it easy for us & help us through this amaana HE entrusted us with, of course life in general, Ameen

  7. Asalamou alaykoum.
    Jazak Allahou kheyran for this article.
    Al hamdulillah it is very useful.
    I am happy to see that I use the right way sometimes I loose control and go back to bad habits. There is something I nees help on. I have 2 kids 3and a half and 2 and few months they sometimes fight and starts to bite and pinch each other and i do not know how to get rid of it. Rules are there even shown on a paper we remind that u do not want to receive the same treatment so do not do it. Result was not there we tried punishment hardship but steel nothing work. What to do? I always remind that Allah SWT gave hands to do good and nice like hugs taking care of others helping.

    • With regards to your children fighting, try these:
      1. Create a loving relationship among your children. Do fun things together as a family.
      2. Hug, kiss and smile frequently to your children every day. This will model to them what being kind and nice to others is.
      3. Give special attention for when your children are playing nicely or behaving nicely to each other. Smile, hug, kiss and tell them that you’re really please with them when they’re behaving kindly to each other. This gives them positive attention.
      And Allah knows best.
      May Allah make it easy on your parenting.

  8. Assalamu aleykum, I am not yet a parent but as I observe the children around me of neighbors friends and relatives I feel like the problems pointed out in the article are almost impossible to avoid! I have read a few books about how to set up effective parenting systems but I feel they will be difficult to enforce during the pressures of real life situations. May Allah give us strength patience and firmness in adopting the Sunnah of our Prophet sallAllahu aleyhi we sellem and grant us a righteous children that will serve the Deen and the Ummah. Thank you for this article pointing out sorely overlooked problems of this generation s parenting problems.

    • Wa alaykum salam. Parenting is never easy. It really helps though to be informed and to make the conscious decision to use or change the way we parent to more effective strategies. It’s great that you’re preparing yourself so when the time comes, you can be mentally and consciously aware.

  9. Assalamu aleykum, I am not yet a parent but as I observe the children around me of neighbors friends and relatives I feel like the problems pointed out in the article are almost impossible to avoid! I have read a few books about how to set up effective parenting systems but I feel they will be difficult to enforce during the pressures of real life situations. It seems all too easy to fall back to the easy uneffective methods that we grew up with and still see plenty around us today. May Allah give us strength patience and firmness in adopting the Sunnah of our Prophet sallAllahu aleyhi we sellem and grant us a righteous children that will serve the Deen and the Ummah. Thank you for this article pointing out sorely overlooked problems of this generation s parenting problems.

  10. JazakAllah khair for this article Jameela. I am a ftm to a 15 months old boy. Trying to read up as much as possible to become the best mother as I can be. I believe in : “children follow your example” and the earlier you begin the better. It all starts in the womb I say. Also, one more thing I believe is how is our attitude towards our own parents? Are we kind to them or giving them a tough time? We need to seek forgiveness from Allah and our parents first to make this parenting journey easier for us. This is the most difficult task ever but we can only be succesful with tons of patience, hardwork and loads of dua. And our intention should always be to make our children a sadqah-e-jariyah for us. May Allah help us mothers in raising our children as future imams and scholars. Ameen.