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  1. Masha Allah and Alhamdulillah. Very nicely written and very informative too. May Allah Subahanwathala bless you always.

  2. Subhanallah amazing article. I didn’t want the article to end because of the gems it contained and the home truths it highlighted. Jazakallah Khair this article benefits from the one thinking of marriage to the veterans of marriage who are just holding it together. Thank you for a well put and thought provoking article.

    • You’re more than welcome Ruksana! This is just a collection of lessons learnt from so many people’s and my own personal experiences which is what makes it hit home :)

  3. MashaAllah.A very beautiful article indeed. I’m now a retired grandmother gone through a lot of life experiences and trying to get closer to Allah azza wa jalla. Alhamdu lillah.May the Almighty Allah reward you.

  4. Jazak Allahu Khairan.Wonderful article.very informative.After 37 years of married life,I reflect and see that my spouse and I are getting very well and following most of the things mentioned in this .

  5. MashaAllah an important topic that should be shared amongst fellow Muslims for Allah’s sake! In the wonderfully informative books “The Ideal Muslim” and “The Ideal Muslimah” by brother in Islam Dr. Muhammad Ali Al-Hashimi are many good advice for Muslim husbands and wives to implement and share :)

    I’ve also written a poem that has some advice for fellow Muslim wives that can inshaAllah offer them tips on how not to envy their co-wives should their husbands be married to more than one :) you can find the poem inshaAllah at May Allah the Most Merciful always bless our marriages, accept all our good deeds and forgive us always by His Mercy. Ameen.

    Wasalaam from the Philippines :)

    • Aameen to your wonderful duas and jazakillah khayr for suggesting the books, Mariam! I’m sure they’ll be of great benefit to whoever reaches them through your reference inshaAllah. :)

  6. MashaaAllah such a Fabulous article.Jazakumullahu khayran kasira & May this be in your Meezan of Hasanaat Ameen.Pls pray for us all as well so we find the comfort of our eyes in our spouse & kids Ameen

  7. A beautiful article that I have thoroughly enjoyed reading. I can certainly relate to each one of the points highlighted in the article and pray that inshallah I have learnt something valuable from it. Thank you

  8. In the Name of Allah
    The Most Gracious The Most Merciful

    The righteous wife -who is she? God knows best.
    A true Muslim, she works to please Allah,
    Your sadness -her worries, your smiles -her rest,
    She loves Allah and the Prophet’s Sunnah.

    Your secrets she keeps, your triumphs she shares,
    Your belongings -she takes care of them well,
    For loving you truly she has such flair,
    All lies about you she buys not nor sells.

    Sweet times you’ve spent with her she saved them all,
    Faith and wisdom she loves sharing with you,
    By the good things about you she’s enthralled,
    And willing to forgive you through and through.

    Blest are Muslims wed to those who fear God.
    Their love is true -not faked nor styled with fraud.

    Mariam Mababaya

    Allah knows best. It was narrated that the noble Messenger Muhammad sallAllahu ‘alaihi wa sallam said: “This world is temporary joys, and the best temporary joy of this world is a righteous wife.” Narrated by Muslim, 1467; Ibn Maajah, 1855, with the wording, “Indeed, this world is no more than temporary joys, and there is no temporary joy of this world that is better than a righteous wife.”
    “A righteous wife to help you with your worldly and religious affairs is
    the best treasure anyone could have.” (Al-Bayhaqi. Sahih al-Jaami’, 4285)

    May Allah the Most Merciful accept all our good deeds and join us with His righteous friends in Firdaus/Heaven near Him and His beloved Messenger Muhammad sallAllahu ‘alaihi wa sallam. Ameen.


  9. Salam and thanks for a beautifully written article. May Allah reward you all abundantly. From my experience I have found that there is no asset in a marriage as much as keeping your tongue under control especially in anger.

  10. A very good read – Masha Allah. Being involved in Islamic work as a family helped to keep us together. Exposure to Islamic Education cured any ignorance about marriage.
    Additionally, respecting that a spouse may want some ‘me’ time and facilitate that. This worked for us.

    • Abu Afeef, mashaAllah I’m so happy to know there’s a couple like you and Umm Afeef who share such exemplary mutual understanding and purpose. May Allah bless your marriage immensely with His pleasure and protection, Aameen.

  11. Assalamualaikum!
    Jazakallahu khairan! Wonderful article and nicely put. :)
    I like the part… “Guarantee a house in jannah to diffuse a fight even if right.” Planning to build a city in jannah! ;)
    May Allah make your, ours and every Muslim family a pillar of strength of our nation.
    Jazakallahu khairan kaseeran!!

    • Sumaiyah, I laughed so hard at your witty comment I’ve officially declared it the wittiest comment we’ve ever received! :D Let’s see whose city is bigger ;) Aameen to your wonderful dua and hayyakillah!

  12. !!!what a wonderful atmosphere I just found here!!! Great article, great comments, a feeling of love, peace, happiness….. Hamdou allah and thanks for all

  13. jazakallah for sharing these inspiring and motivational tips – a wonderful article to read ; InshaaAllah Allah grant all our homes with Mohabbat and Barakah summah ameen

  14. Superb article. Subhaanallah. Great amount of research and knowledge makes such a good piece of literature. May Allah gives us tawfeeq to follow and live our lives according to its Divine principles. Ameen.

  15. Assalamu alaikum. Awesome article. Allah bless u. “To enjoy a sucessfull marriage, you have to fall in love everyday with the the same person”!

  16. Wow. SubhanaAllah. This is one of the realest and helpful article i’ve read on marriage, especially from an Islamic perspective. I will be coming back to this article again as a reminder and reference until inshaAllah I am able to implement and internalize the lessons. JazakaAllah khayr dear sister. May Allah swt bless you and all of us in our marriages and grant us jannatul firdous!

  17. Ma shaa Allah great article. What I can add for a happy marriage is each spouse should concern themselves with fulfilling their spouse’s rights rather than simply focusing on whether their own rights are being met. This really helps to sow love and goodwill between the couple.

      • Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah hi wa barkatuh.
        Wonderful article, may Allah swt bless you for this splendid article.
        May Allah swt grant us all more patience, understanding and maturity while dealing with our spouses.
        ZazakaAllah wa khayr.

  18. mashallah..beautiful and a really informative article .thank you so much zaynab:-)Allah bless u and ur family.
    iam married for 5 years and alhamdulillah we are blessed with 2 wonderful kids…its my second marriage ( my husbands too)..Allah tested us in our earlier life..but alhamdulillah he blessed us a wonderful life now…we both understand each other nicely…
    what i discovered in my marital life is…we must be the positive energy to our spouse…my husband is a short tempered person…but now he changed a lot…he says that i have been patient with him(iam not self praising) but…i really wanted to say dat..wen they are fire we must be water for them…
    Then they will realize the love ..and also u vl be rewarded for patience.
    jazaakallah khairan

    • MashaAllah Sahla, I feel so happy reading your story! It’s so rare to find Muslim couples who’ve understood this fundamental truth about marriage: all of us have weaknesses and marriage is about supporting each other in getting over them. May Allah continue to bless you and your family with unending happiness and peace, Aameen.

  19. VERY VERY VERY Powerful and practical ways. May Allah increase the people of this origination with knowledge and wisdom to convey to the masses

  20. Jazakallahu khairan for this amazing post.
    Can you please post something about a man’s attitude towards his in-laws, especially parents. The kind who’ve done a lot for him financially and practically and helped him get a job. He’s blooming in the job but treats themvery unfairly and has dedeliberately forgotten the favour of them being the source of the seed that has bloomed.
    Makes me want to be a bad daughter-in-law although thats not how my parents have brought me up to be, his parents havent been such either.
    He’s a good man, except Im not very happy about his ikhlaaq and have no idea how to help him improve that.

    • I understand Rozina and really admire that you’ve chosen not to lower your own principles. Islam highly emphasizes the need to thank people for their kindnesses and favors, but sometimes we all have a tendency to forget to maintain this basic ethic. Keep continuing to model the right behavior and I’m sure your husband will realize and make up for what he should be doing inshaAllah.

  21. MashaAllah sister. This is by far the best article i’ve read on marriage. You haven’t left anything out. Jazaakhillah khairan for taking the time and effort to write this piece. In shaa Allah will share with lots of people.

  22. Masha Allah… Very good article. Really helpful and guide line for those who are planning for marriage. Every body must read this informative article before and after marriage. Jazakallah.

  23. Asalaam Alaikum wr. wb.

    I just wanted to say JazakAllah khair for writing and sharing such an amazing article. MashaAllah. . while reading the article. There are so many times I realized how accurate and true all the points are.
    May Allah swt bless you and both as a couple.


  24. masha was a great message for recentky married couples and for teenagers to prepare themselves for the sake off allah.may allah grant all of us a good spouse (an angel) which makes our life in this world something similar to JANNAH.””””””””””””””AMEEN SUMMA AMEEN”””””””””””””””

  25. MaShaAllah,
    Such a well written article,I’l make sure to keep all this in mind when I get married.
    May Allah bless you for your efforts.

  26. It is indeed an awesone article! Masha’Allah
    May the writer succeed in both worlds,May Allah make the marriage of young muslimin successiful and May Allah grant happy marriage to those who are looking forward to get married. Ameen Ameen
    it realy inspired me and am grateful

  27. JazakAllah khair for bringing us the much needed beautiful article and tips.
    May Allah preserve and bless our marriages and make the spouse a source of tranquility, peace and guidance for eachother.

    Seeing so many marriages break around me, i randomly questioned my husband about what does marriage mean to him:
    And his said

    I think marriage is about sharing my life, both good and bad with another person who i believe will cherish, support and guide me through the journey we have been created for. Most importantly encourage me to be the best i can be while tolerating but not accepting my shortcoming as she believes me to be better then i am and vice versa.

    The best thing i love about my husband is how he discourages / stops me from the wrong and encourages/supports me for the good.
    There are times i express my irritation when he guides me, but deep down i know what he’s telling me is Haqq.

    Another best quality of him that keeps me happy is his Just nature.

    Alhamdulillah! it is these substantial qualities they keep the spark of our marriage alive.

  28. Assalamu alaikum dear sister zaynab

    What I would like to say is, the first thought that came to my mind after reading this article is that Allah has not forsaken me.But then I realised that , it doesnt happen that way. Allah doesnt forsake anyone unless we do the same. May be you wont believe what I am about to say, but I think this single article has really helped me realise the bigger picture. After more than 7 years of marriage , I have a beautiful daughter but my marriage is in shatters. We are no longer even living together.I now realise ,after your article, that there have been mistakes from both me and my husband. But your article has given me the hope that all is not lost. Although my husband cannot fulfill his duties, I have decided I l be more patient and try to fulfill my duties. It is with tears in my eyes that I am writing this, but I sincerely ask all my brothers and sisters here to pray for us. What struck me most was the hadith about shaytan’s role in breaking up a marriage. I know we love each other because I remember the day when our daughter was born, he looked at me with such love in his eyes.Allah’s plans are great, because its been less than a week since I found out this website.and this article has really saved a family
    Thank you sister zaynab..Jazakallahu khair.
    May Allah grant all of us(all those behind this wonderful website and all those who follow this) jannah.Aameen

  29. Asalaamu alaikum. I thoroughly enjoyed this and will share. My favorite quote “Marriages begin to go headlong into constant unhappiness when one or both spouses forget this fundamental fact: marriage makes people partners, not parts of each other that must be controlled and bossed over.” This is something many men and women need a reminder of. I also like how you attacked the male vs female stereotype of what they need in marriage. Unfortunately it seems that many people out there are suffering in their marriages because they didn’t do enough to assess what someone was like before marriage. I’d love to see a follow-up article from you on identifying a compatible potential spouse. JAK! Mona

  30. Ma sha Allah Ma sha Allah really worth reading article
    Subhan Allah really it gave me a great help ma sha Allah
    May Allah accpet ur effort for.his deen and imcrease ur knowledge Ameen
    May Allah bless u in all manners ameen

  31. By Allah’s will this is the best advice for every couple out there.. including me. I hope that I can refer to this article in my marriage life. Thank you and jazakallahu khairan katheera..

  32. Mash’Allah it’s the best detailed article I have read so far :) Jazak’Allah I’m not married but yeah this is something that every youth should read and understand before getting married:)

  33. Thank you very much sister Zaynab for the amazing article. I loved how detailed and informative it was. I like your use of the ahadeeth and ayaat of the Quran. My wife loved it too. I pray that we’d be able to implement this in our family and the families of the Muslim Ummah.


    Majed and Kevser,
    Graduates of International Islamic University Malaysia, Kuantan Campus. :)

  34. MashaAllah Sister, Jazaakillah kheir for a very insightful and absolutely beautiful article.I am definitely sharing this with so many people.

  35. Assalaamualekum sister was a vr beautiful article, jazakallah khairan. Im yet to get married surely learnt so many good things from it for time to come. Its so important for todays time for the families… May Allah reward you

  36. Thank-you
    This article will inshaAllah help us become a happier couple together. Though Alhumdolillah we already practice atleast 70 % of it but the Hadith and Quran quotes make it all the more applicable.

  37. Assalamu alaikum, masha allah very much informative article…..thanks for your work.May allah swt bless you and reward you more.

  38. Assalamu alikum,it was very beneficial article and very inspiring too.May allah help u in writing more articles and give u success in ur goals. inshallah i willtry my best to implement this in my life.jazakallah khairan .sister your way of explaing is very good ,please send some articles.

  39. I found your article is very well writen and nice, very inspiring as well. Glad to know that one of my moslem sister spreads the spirits of Islam to the world.

    Sadly, I have found EXACTLY the same article on another site which I believed plegiarize from your site and, of course, without referred this to you. Check this out.

    Keep writing and sharing, Sister!

  40. asalam alaikum. thank you for such a wonderful article, i am not married yet but i found it so educating and interesting. i hope i will try to implement that in my marriage when that time comes In Shaa Allah

  41. A brilliant and immensely impressive article on marriage! I feel the most important aspects of what is truly required for a healthy happy marriage have been beautifully and aptly written here!
    My husband and I read this together while on a long drive and both of us couldn’t stop talking about how thorough and clear this article was, MashaAllah!

    I have been married for a year now, and even though my marriage is still in it’s infancy, my husband and I have slowly tried to incorporate most of the above points in our life and we hope and pray to grow the more we live together, InshaAllah.

    I think one of the most important aspect that really made us get close and understand each other better was being able to communicate our feelings, needs and priorities openly with each other.

    And what we realized was that, the key to effective communication was first of all, to have an open heart, and a mindset to acknowledge the concern and change if the need be for the better, simply because we know that we love each other, and that every concern talked about and resolved would only add to making “us” have a healthy relationship which in turn will lead to contentment and happiness for the both of us.

    We also felt that being considerate towards each other in good times as well as during hard times, or when facing an issue, without forgetting what we mean each other helps a lot in keeping each other in check and not letting small things get to us. The moment a couple stops being considerate to each other, that’s when things get unreasonable and each episode takes away from the healthy state of the marriage.

    May Allah bless you and reward you immensely for this remarkable article, Zayn. And hope it benefits and helps a lot of people in the best way possible, inshaAllahh.

  42. Masha Allah . Very nice article. I would say that, each and every couple has to go through this article more than 10 times and ensure that they remember these points every time.

    May Allah reward us . May Allah protect us from evil deeds and give us strength to perform more and more good deeds.

  43. Jzkk for the lovely well written article ! I’m feeling mushy reading it since we just celebrate our 21st wedding anniversary a week ago :)

    Loads of things happened of course throughout the years & yes, what’s written here are all positive things that no matter how long you have been married, never too much to check it out & practice them.
    Thanks in sharing these wonderful inspiring article
    Sincerely, Umm AHNI, Aberdeen

  44. Ma sha Allah! Superb. A bit like Tiramisu: RICH in information, BALANCED composition of flavours – neither shifting the duty of ensuring a happy marriage all on the woman, nor making the man appear as the evil factor, SOFT in laguage and style, in short, simply DELICIOUS

  45. The abundance of gender role reinforcement in this article is depressing. “Need bread”?! Really. And also, a Muslim woman could be equally as likely to be the main income provider of the family and shouldn’t be assumed to only be useful for cleaning and whatever rubbish you have in your writing. Please stop encouraging these gender roles, it’s 2015.

    • Thanks for your comment Sarah. Can’t see where I mentioned the gender of the sender and recipient of that Whatsapp conversation you’re referring to. :) Same reason why the article particularly says ‘spouse’ instead of ‘husband/wife’ throughout. Have a great day!

  46. The article is very inspiring. I need some advice.
    I am the one who withhold Islam in our house . My husband does not have time for me at all but he does take care of our 3 kids.
    He rarely converse with me and most of the time in anger . He does exactly the opposite of what the article says.
    Anyway he does not want to talk about religion.
    What do I do? Please help.

    • Walaykumsalam Sr. Sabiha, I’m sorry to hear that you’re upset about something in your marriage. I have some good news though: we’ve got an article on emotionally connecting with your spouse that’s coming up this Monday that I feel would be of great help to you iA! Come back to our website day after and I hope you’ll find the article beneficial.

  47. The article is very inspiring, practical and helpful. I have been married for almost 14 years and have learned a lot from the article.

  48. MashAllah..
    This is really amazing..
    May Allah bless all the marriages of the Muslim Ummah..
    Allahumma Ameen..

  49. Assalam o alaikum!
    This article reflects my thoughts.
    It looks like that you have read my mind and put it here.
    I am not married but I think like that.
    Is it possible to have a such beautiful blessed married life?
    Pray for me to have a such beautiful married life.
    Gratefull for this article.
    You are really amazing writer.
    I want to write like that.
    Your dua is previous for me.
    Jazak Allah Khairan

  50. Assalamu Alaikum. Thank you so much. This is one of my favorite articles on marriage thus far ^_^ Jazakallahu Khairaa

  51. Ma shaa Allah!! What a beautiful article. I love your sense of humour and the points raised in the article are too familiar and valid. Jazakallahu Khayran for this beautiful piece.

  52. Salam, yeah the article is really worth reading and contemplating. Believe me, my wife and me, at the time of marriage decided upon most of the above mentioned things to adhere to. Now it’s been 7 years by Allah’s Mercy and every day we see our mutual admiration rising up. We have hardly had any serious arguments and the Sunnah brings us closer as we try to follow the obligations upon us. I request all my friends especially the males, that if we respect and love our wives (I am sure all muslim husbands do; yet reminding as they have innumerous rights in Islam) as the sharia’h wants; we will have the best possible home on earth because it’s from a husband’s side a wife can groom into a very religiously confident personality and then the wife will be enough to change the WHOLE CLAN that follows!!!

  53. MashaAllah great article!

    How do you cope with a husband who Mot directeur a écrire his wife for not giving him enough time as she has young Children to look after and does not even have time for herself?

  54. Alhamdulillah for this article. Eventhough it’s old, it’s such a coincidence that I’m reading it just this morning. it’s my sixteenth marriage anniversary. I got up this morning and called my husband (he’s away) to ask him what day it was because he always forgets. As predicted, he had no idea. Soon enough he remembered and was full of apologies and assurance that it was not for lack of importance that he forgets. Then I was showered with prayers and blessings and most of all, gratitude. I felt on top of the world. Then I came to read this article. This further emphasized the importance of gratitude in a marriage. Couples should always express their gratitude. Barakallahu feeki my sister.

  55. hnhnhnhnhnhnhnhnhn, Masha Allah ,may Allah bless u always,give u a best place in jaannah tul firdos ,remember my parents in your prayers tooo,i wish from my Lord ,He give me a good and loyal converted muslimah as my life partner,nice post brooooooooooooooooooo

  56. Assalmu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh. I want to know that is there any a’mal or things to do or any dua to get married quickly in The Holy Quran and The Authentic Hadiths? Plz reply soon. Zazakallah.

  57. Sis Zaynab, Chapeau for all yr efforts. May Allah bless u for this amazing reminder. I would like to point out that by asking Allah for sabr as Mount Uhud n remaining quiet even when u r not at fault, remembering that Allah is with the patient quite often saves our marriage from blazing under shaytan’s sway.

  58. Jazakillahu Khairan Katheeran, Very Informative and very well written. May Allah accept your deeds and great intentions of serving Ummah.

  59. Alhamdulillah..jazakallah..really I got a lot of information.I married before 4 years.for about a year we are having small small arguments a lot.?..masha Allah now it’s going smoothly?

  60. masha ALLAH. glad i came stumbled on dis article. it has changed and contributed to my perspective about marrige. cant wait to impliment it insha ALLAH. JAZAKHALLU KHAIRAN sister! may ALLAH bless ur home and make it easy on the entire ummah

  61. masha ALLAH. glad i stumbled on dis article. it has changed and contributed to my perspective about marrige. cant wait to impliment it insha ALLAH. JAZAKHALLU KHAIRAN sister! may ALLAH bless ur home and make it easy on the entire ummah

  62. a beautiful article.well written.i am not marrige yet.insha allah i will take all these as wonderful advices.pray for me .may allah bless you.

  63. Sis, Thank you for these beautiful words of wisdom. I have caused my wife to be unhappy for the past 20 years but I didn’t understand why and I didn’t know what to do. Almost on the verge of giving up… However, after reading your article, I am full of hope and I will work really hard to follow your advice. May Allah bless you. Jazakallahukhairan.

  64. Sis, beautiful words of wisdom. My home is not tranquil now but I didn’t know what to do. However, your article has given me hope and I am going to try really hard to follow your good advice. May Allah bless you. Jazakallahukhairan…

  65. Very nice sayings but if one gives 100 percent honesty towards her husband and he shows no love to her what she would do instead of that she gave lot of care but he resumes life is so miserable i used to cry every night plz pray for me

  66. Salaam
    I enjoyed this article. JazakAllah khayr. My only one feedback is that women should not feel that they need to wear make up to look beautiful for our spouses. There is no need to cover the beauty Allah has blessed us with. May Allah guide us to see the real beauty HE has blessed us with. Aameen.

  67. Salaam.
    This is a highly educative and inspiring message for married muslim couples.

    Jazakallahu khairan.

  68. What a wonderful insight to how a marriage should be. Thank you as I have learnt loads. My husband is great alhamdolilah but my problem is I am finding ways but I am no satisfied with my marriage purely because I live with my in laws. Alhamdolilah they are nice but I can’t remember the last time having a private moment to share between us as constantly I feel I am on display and everything I do ends up to please them or their guests. By the time we go to our room he has to be up really early so he’s asleep within 10 minute’s. Even though I am married it’s like I’m not and this family have adopted me so I went to being a kid at my parents to a still a child for another family. It’s very frustrating and he doesn’t want to admit it. We spoke to his parents about living close by but they’ve refused as he is the only son but it’s unfortunate because I see us drifting and he doesn’t. I see why now Allah has forbidden anybody to come in between the privacy of a man and his wife I just wish I could enjoy being married to him

  69. Alhamdulilah, thank you for reinforcing these good habits and practices. Despite my efforts to set a reasonable example, I fear that I may be married to Shaytan.

    1. They love each other for Allah’s sake
    On rare occasions do I feel loved as I am frequently poked with sharp words. I am convinced that I am here to [somehow] mellow the spouse… but HOW??????

    2. They are grateful for each other
    I am a regular target of wedding rings, cell phones, epithets, insults and accusations ALL being THROWN at me. I am grateful to be patient, thick skinned & somehow understanding. I wonder how/why I should be the target of such pith & vinegar.

    3. They communicate like best friends
    Sometimes. But mostly, my every word & action are micro-managed, on the phone, while driving, in public, at family functions. More and more I find the peace is achieved by keeping my mouth shut.

    4. They never lose focus of each other’s primary needs
    Well, perhaps… but if one’s needs are never actioned, where did the focus go?

    5. They are the comfort of each other’s eyes
    Only when I’m treated gently… not when I’m being yelled at.

    6. They make each other bloom
    Working in the same facility, my spouse has no interest in hearing the adventure of my day or what I may be involved in.

    7. They make time for each other – no matter what!
    Nope, the cell phone has me trumped.

    8. They fight the real enemies: ego, evil eye and shaytan
    According to my spouse, not only am I Shaytan, but I have also ruined my spouse’ life.

    9. They sense each other’s stress
    Well yes & no. The reason we only have sex once in three months, is because of my spouse’s stress levels.

    10. They are conscious of Allah in conflict
    I pray for divine intervention before the ruckus begins!


  70. Aslmalaikum mashaallah Jazakallahukheir these are good tips for couple life …may Allah make us follow what is right n live what is forbidden AMIN

  71. Going through a troubled marriage since its early days 2.5 years ago, reading this article has opened my eyes to much truth that I was blind too. But I think it’s too late. The tips and advice so smoothly and beautifully presented, jazaki Llahu khairan, sound to be so simple, so easy and handy and while reading through the article, I was saying to myself… yes this is where I went/ go wrong… I need to do this next time an issue arises, but once that time is on, it’s all the same thing again. I’m short tempered and fall short in controlling anger when I should. On the other hand, my husband loses patience very quickly and lacks understanding. To our surroundings, we are said to be very good muslims but in between us we just succeed in getting the worst out of one another.

  72. what would be the best advice for 2years married couple with no kids yet facing every day with anger and keep fighting arguing to each other. example : husband and wife just come back from work, wife try to start a conversation by telling what shes doing and feeling that day at work, but husband suddenly start to say something annoying and not related to what the wife says, he started to talk about other things and then start to argue to each others. seems like everyday have to face this. :(

  73. Beautiful article, jazakkallah khair!!
    Stumbled upon this article after I had a small tiff with my husband. This article helped me calm down and made me think about my blessings from almighty for such a good spouse, Alhamdulillah.

  74. I begin in the name of Allah.
    I thank Allah SWT, for my marriage, my spouse, yes I’ve had my share of ups and downs, with patience, and faith in Allah, I truly have found peace, tranquility and contentment.
    A word of advice, always do everything for the sake of Allah. When I was a teenager and time of getting married, I waited for my spouse, saying who ever Allah sends will be good for me. So it has been الحمد لله.
    Ma Shallah amazing article jzk.

  75. Salaam ale kum Mashallah it’s heart warming to know that there are,people out there who give,us as muslims what we haven’t got in today’s islam which is relevant islamic information which helps us in our day to day existence.
    I an from Birmingham westmidlands UK and we have a major problem with divorces people from Birmingham especially the sisters take divorce as the first option
    The masjid like green lane glm facilitate the divorces making it a sunnah the rest central mosque salfi masjid etc show cultish tribalism traits, if your a simple straight forward muslim it’s very hard. They withhold this type of knowledge no marriage classes if there is,it’s for money we got Organisations like Al magrib joke,money business and group mindset.
    So may Allah Reward the people for encouraging the good for the sake,of Allah because here In Birmingham it’s,all show

  76. Assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu. jazakallahu khairan kasseera sis Zaynab. masha allah.i feel soo blessed and lucky to hav read this article just few days before starting my marriage life…i feel its a must read article fr evry married boy or girl or even ppl who r goin to getting married.Allhamdulillah im thankful to my future sis in law who shared me the link of this article.. In shaa Allah i will try to implement all of these habitss n try to improve myself better n would like to get included among the happy muslim couples?.in shaa allah?.MAY ALLAH REWARD U IMMENSELY N MAY HE MAKE US AND OUR SPOUSES COOLNESS OF EYES TO EACH OTHER AND ENTER JANNAH TOGETHER..AMEEN.

  77. Jazzakallahu Kher and May Allah S.W.T grant you bounties in these dunya and Akhera Ameen for such an Immense work you have share…lastly i would love to share some of articles i have done and Inn Sha Allah it will be of beneficial to the Ummah but I lack the platform to Share and Would love to do these for my parents and for Sadaqatul Jaaria Inn Sha Allah.

  78. related to point number 8, maintain intimacy as privacy is part of keeping the marriage itself, love this article and exemplary and may be habit consistent in our marriage all, aameen…

  79. Mashallah this is very informative and encouraging for many who have strayed in their
    faith. I am married Alhamdulillah 22 years and still feel the need to self analyze. Jazakallah .

  80. Assalamualaikum and shukran for the wonderful advice which makes so much of sense.I hope all Muslim couples could work on their marriages in much the same way.Inshalla ameen.

  81. As-Salam-alaikum,
    Great article, but please remember that after all that has been tried to re-concise, divorce is also permissible and not taboo.

  82. I loved this article, very informative, I will be getting married shortly , In Sha Allah, I will put into practice your advice’s, In Sha Allah, May Allah bless u, I will get back to read this article again and again, Jazakallah khair..

  83. All thanks be to everliving,this your article is good for married coulpes in their relationships and for single people.jazakunmllah ahaira.

  84. Masha-Allah what an article… I hope and wish Allah to make my marriage life better….Jazak-Allah for this brilliant article.please make dua for my marriage life….May Allah’s peace and blessings be upon us and you….

  85. Asalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh :)

    Jazakumullah hu khairan for this beautifully written reminder sister :)
    I really love the final point. I like how the speaker reply :). full of wisdom :) Reminds a lot of me of me and my husband ( I am blessed! Alhamdulillah ^_ ^ )

    “What a person looks like to us is not necessarily what they are behind closed doors. So before judging whether a person is right or wrong for someone, remember that Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla (glorified and exalted be He) chooses spouses for us not to test us but to help us purify and improve our own selves.”

    Often, it happens that we easily judge something just by what we sees.. we forgot that there much more hidden from what our eyes could see.

  86. MashaAllah TabarakAllah! Very well written Zaynab. It’s truly enlightening and encouraging. I have been your school mate for awhile if you could remember, and it gives me great pleasure to see my friend do such good for the Muslim Ummah. The article has been penned down really well. I’m really happy that it’s touching so many people’s hearts and minds! May Allah accept your efforts and grant you Jannah! Ameen. Keep up the good work!

  87. Askm wrwb

    How do we communicate effectively when we need to be away from each other

    Just due to not communicationg well whn we r far is putting our marriage into trouble

  88. Thank you for sharin this very beneficial post, may allah reward you with every letter,

    Its because family is the nucleas of society and the parents are the custodians in charge of the family that when there is instability between them this threatens the entire families and thus what makes up society and damage integrates into society, because of children or spouses cant come to a safe and stable home then chaos spreads

  89. This is a good article, sister. Very informative and full of good advises. May Allah Subhanahu watallah bless us all and guide us.

    Jazakallahu Khairan

  90. This is amazing. Comprehensive. It’s like a one stop shop for advice on all things marriage related. Amazing. I find myself unable to stop smiling.

    • Married for 10 years…with 3 children we have ticked all the right boxes
      Im so grateful to allah we’re best friends and always throwing flirty glances at each other..without our 9 year old realising the key to our success is that we have been allways there for one another through difficult times .always helped him and his financially no that hes financially stable he treats me like a queen. Allah says give charity and i will double it for you…indeed comforting and helping your spouses through difficult times is charity and indeed allah has not doubled but tripled it for us.allahmdullilah

  91. This is beautiful .. what I’ve realized is that marriage is difficult there are so many differences as you are trying to align yourself to another lifestyle , different rules and rituals and you and your spouse need to find a center to all of that ,which in turn causes conflict , I have not been married for a generous amount of time but I have realized that at everything is difficult but as time goes your start adjusting . Marriage is about communication and sharing if you can master that you are on your way to happiness. Making your spouse a priority and valuing them constantly increases love ,who doesn’t want to be central to someone’s life .Its enriching to know the differences between the male and female psyche . Each gender has their own love language men might feel loved when you give them space or spoil them with gifts while woman might feel loved when you speak sweetly to her ,take her out and spoil her . As human beings we all have specific emotional needs that. Need to be met and only our spouses can meet those needs . Remember brothers and sisters your spouses are closer to you then anyone so respect them appreciate them be loyal to them and strive to keep them happy . If your spouse is Happy you will automically be happier

  92. These are very useful tips.
    I always search and study articles that how to improve our marriage life. I have married 5 years ago with my beloved wife and we have two cute kids Alhamdulillah, we are very happy and we think we are the best couple around the world, we never encounter any argument and problem in our life, what are the reasons for this I will explain below.
    1- My wife is educated, she studied Mathematics and science, she were the teacher at the school for more than 4 years but now she doesn’t do it because she wants to look after our kids and stay with me more during the day and pleasure me to enjoy our life more.
    2- I always advise in everything in my life with her and deeply listen to her advises and follow them if I think she is right and share everything with her and we never tell lie to each other.
    3- I never think that she is responsible for all home duties she should do them alone, when I am at home on off days or get home from office, I always help her in cooking, washing clothes, cleaning home and many other works. What is the big impact of doing these works I do with my wife? Answer: When I do these she feel very happy and she thinks my husband is my best and closest friend and he will never leave me alone until last day of our life and he respects and supports me.
    4- I always share my incomes with her and never say lie to her about this, and I give 10 percent of my monthly salary to her to use this money only for herself and I never ask her for this money but I think she saves this money for her kid’s education, ( Respect mothers )
    5- I never reject her requests even those I can not do. But how is it possible. When she ask me for something or request me for something, if I am able to do them I do that as she wants, if I can not do them I never hurt her heart or feelings and I convince her about that very kindly, I continue this till I receive her contentment.
    6- We always trust each other and never doubt each other, if a husband doubt on her, it will destroy her feelings and will have a bad result in their life.
    7- When I leave home every when I kiss her and tell her “I love you too much” and be careful about yourself and during the day I send her some text or call sometime, when I get home I kiss her and held her in my arms and ask some questions, like How are you? How was your day? Did something bad happened or not? if the answer is yes, What was the problem? How did it happen? and What is the salutation?
    8- We share our love in bed according to a schedule, and I never think she is only a sex toy and I consider she is my princess.
    9- Sometimes I buy some small gifts for her and always celebrate some special days of our life, like our engagement day, our wedding day, ours and our kids anniversary days and sometimes I get her out and go somewhere.
    10- We sit together in our time drinking tea and talk about our life our favorite things and how to improve our life and how to be good parents for our kids and we ask each other some questions and then follow them in our life, like What do you like to eat? Which kinds of clothes do you like? Where do you want to go? What do you hope from me to do for you?
    11- I never compare her with other women and she never compares me with other men and we never compare our life with other people and always say Alhamdullilah we have the best life.
    12- I always tell her “I love you very much” in our native language ” Dira ra bandi grana iee” and always tell, you are the best in the world and you are my princess.

    Dear Muslim brothers, kindly improve your life and love your wives, they are the supplement of your life, they are the biggest gifts of Allah for us, they are our princess, respect them, love them, help and support them, If you have some problems in your life kindly find the solution for them. May Allah bless all Muslim around the world. Amen
    Rohullah Asem from Afghanistan

  93. Jazak Allah khair for writing such a great article, will surely share this with friends and family.
    Every point was so clear :)
    May Allah swt bless you in both worlds

  94. thanks so much for your help in guiding muslems ummah to acheive peace in marriage life.

  95. JazakiAllah khairan. Really the every word of this article gave sense Alhamdulilah. Am getting married soon inshaaAllah and I was worried to see conflicts between spouses and afraid if even I get this. I was looking for an solution. And here it was. JazakiAllahu khairan :)

  96. An ideal post for the couples who are looking for happiness in their relationships. I liked the way you covered the each and every topic step by step, also your explanations are just outstanding. As you said that a sense of gratefulness towards each other strengthens a relationship. I do agree! There mustn’t be any communication gaps between couples and they must do it like the best friends. Thanks a lot…!!!

  97. One of the most interesting and beneficial article iv read in a long time. Masha-Allah! I will forward this link for the benefit of others too in sha Allah

  98. Jazakallah khair for the wonderful article! I have learned a lot. As someone going through a lot in my marriage (please make duah that everything gets resolved please) I found myself seeking refuge in Allah again, my husband and I have been very negligent of each other and are now in a situation where he doubts there is any hope for us. But Inshallah we can get through this and with these helpful reminders which I have faith that with the will of Allah, the harmony and blessings of Allah will once be restored in our marriage.

    Once again Jazakallah kahir for the wonderful reminders and tips on how to be a good spouse and that if you don’t have Allah in your life, then nothing right happens. May Allah bless you!

  99. This is a profound article and a must read for every couple-whether soon to be or years into the relationship. JazakAllahu khair for such a wonderful gem, May Allah swt bless you immensely for your time and effort in writing this piece. Will definitely be sharing this with all my girlfriends and saving this for future reference!